Put the marriage first

This goes for fathers and mothers alike. Putting the children first sounds very self-sacrificing, but it is actually short-sighted and self-serving. It's a lot easier to unilaterally decide what it is the children need and provide that than it is to listen to your spouse and put their needs first. Some data on the male cheaters:

A survey of more than 5,000 cheating men reveals that 78 per cent of the respondents are in their first marriage, and that 82 per cent of them began to be unfaithful after having children. It seems for some men, having a child is the catalyst for starting an extra-marital affair

The most common reason men gave (30 per cent) for their infidelity was that sex with their partner stopped being passionate after the baby came. Nearly a quarter (23 per cent) tried to use the excuse that the lack of sleep commonly experienced by parents of young children had led to problems in the bedroom which had caused them to stray. Along a similar vein, 18 per cent stated that their spouse turned all of their attention to the children and this lack of attention led to their infidelity.

The blame can't be put on the mothers, though. First, these men chose to cheat. And second, how many of these adulterers stopped expecting and demanding attention from their wives, and simply waited for them to stop focusing 100 percent on their children?

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Portrait of a pioneer

In more good news for the sexual equalitarians, it appears women in the military are closing the all-important suicide gap between male and female soldiers:

Informed sources tell MilitaryCorruption.com that three of the deceased - two officers and an NCO - allegedly took their own lives over the Easter weekend. One of them was a female captain who blazed the trail as first of her gender to command an all-female F.E.T. (Female Engagement Team) sent to improve relations with Afghan women.

ALL-FEMALE UNIT EXPERIMENT FAILED

Kelly Hasselman was a super-achiever, just the kind of young officer the Army loves to point to as an ideal. An honor graduate (2007) of the Citadel, she excelled at every challenge she took on. All except one. The much-ballyhooed F.E.T. 55-woman detachment she commanded soon imploded, no fault of it's earnest leader.

"A number of women got pregnant and were sent back to the States," an officer in the know told MCC. "Others were producing pornography for American GIs, and some of the raunchy photos included females in lesbian poses."

Whether this "failure," a first in the intense and highly-successful career of Kelly Hasselman, was enough to send her off the rails, or her death has a more sinister origin, we cannot say for sure at this early date.

Why, I do believe we may have a case of Hultgreen-Curie Syndrome at work here. And isn't it wonderful that women now can join the military and commit suicide just like men do! If that's not powerful evidence of the sustainability of the equalitarian society, what is?

So, here is a thought: what if young women were encouraged to get married, bear children, and raise them instead of being encouraged to go to college, join the army, and commit suicide? Isn't it at least possible that this might be a more functional basis for society?

"Cpt. Hasselman once explained to me that she would like to marry and have children, but that her career made the prospect so difficult."

It seems likely that if she had been encouraged to do so, she would still be alive. Feminism kills.

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SMV vs MMV

Most men are familiar with the distinction between women they would like to marry and women they would only like to use for sexual purposes. However, for some strange reason, they appear to often be blind to the fact that women divide men into both categories as well.

The important difference is that whereas men are often as, if not more, sexually attracted to the women they want to marry, women are usually less sexually attracted to the men they want to marry. They value them for "other things", which includes security, safety, and provision.

Hence this belated realization for many men:

Think of all the ass you pulled in college when you lived in a shithole, sheets over the windows, furniture from the dumpster, pounding shitty beer and sleeping on a soiled mattress on the floor. She never talked about window treatments, new cars, McMansions or vacations.

The answer is not to move out of your house and into student housing, but rather to understand the dynamic at work. There is nothing wrong with window treatments, new cars, McMansions or vacations, but THEY ARE NOT CONNECTED TO SEXUAL RELATIONS. Providing them does NOTHING to turn her on or make her want to have sex with you.

The summary: boosting your MMV does not boost your SMV.

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Advocating illegitimacy

Steve Sailer raises an eyebrow at the judgment of young women and that of the academics who advocate single motherhood:

A couple of law professors eventually slip a little affordable family formation heresy into Slate's XX after the usual Bad White Man verbiage:

    Just Say No

    For white working-class women, it makes sense to stay single mothers.

    By Naomi Cahn and June Carbone

    The following is based on Marriage Markets: How Inequality Is Remaking the American Family, out in May 2014 from Oxford University Press.

    Lily had grown up in a rural town, more than an hour from Kansas City, Mo. She was four months pregnant and not feeling well, and she was in tears. She was also not married, but that’s not what was upsetting her. The car that she needed to get to her two jobs in the city had broken down, and she had no other way to get to work. We asked whether her boyfriend, Carl, could help her. Lily frowned. She had recently broken up with Carl, she explained, because “I can support myself. I always have. I can support myself and our kid. I just can’t support myself, the kid, and him.”

You know, Lily, if Carl is such a loser that you don't want to marry him, why did you want 50% of your child's genes to be his? Are you really that convinced that your 50% are going to be so awesome that your kid won't wind up a loser?

I suspect this is giving Lily considerably more credit for her ability to link cause-and-effect than is justified. Here she is, literally in tears over her inability to get to her two jobs that she isn't going to be able to work effectively when the child arrives, but she's insisting that she can support herself.

So, instead of having Carl work while Lili stays home and raises the child, the Brave New Society of Bastards has Lili trying to simultaneously work and raise the child alone, while Carl spends his time living off the government while pursuing his next Lili.

This should be sustainable.

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Cheerleader appeal

Forget the debate over paying NCAA football players. The more pressing question is if NFL teams should pay their cheerleaders:

They are not, after all, being forced. They audition for spots on the team, and the reason that management can get away with being so obnoxious is that for every woman who makes it, many more would love to take her spot. So they must get something out of their performance: status, the joy of dancing in public, esprit de corps.

It seems conceivable to me -- indeed, likely -- that women who get a spot on the local cheerleading squad enjoy better job prospects and enhanced dating opportunities. Forget whether these women should want to date men who want to date them because they like telling people that their girlfriend is a Dallas Cowboys Cheerleader. I’m sure cheerleaders like the oohs of appreciation they get when someone drops the name of their squad, just like journalists don’t mind the reaction when they tell folks they work for the Economist or the New York Times. And while you wouldn’t want someone whose only interest in you was your prestige employer, you probably wouldn’t really mind if they considered that a small plus factor.

The team, then, has something these women value. Should we be angry that the team trades it on the best possible terms?

There is no question whatsoever that it ups their dating prospects. I went out with several Minnesota Vikings cheerleaders and a few Minnesota Timberwolves cheerleaders, and I probably would have only been attracted to two of them if they had been non-cheerleaders.

I mean, if you're a sports fan, you've been seeing cheerleaders through idealized lenses for pretty much your entire life. So, when someone says, "this is X, she's a Vikings cheerleader," she is instantly two points hotter. Maybe even three. It's just that simple.

It's no different than telling a woman "this is Y, he's the CEO of Whatever corporation." She doesn't even hear what the corporation is called, she just hears those magic words, "CEO", and he's immediately anywhere from 2-5 points more attractive.

What is +2-3 points of attractiveness worth to a woman? Quite a bit, obviously, or they wouldn't be willing to trade so much time and effort for it.

That being said, with the amount of money the teams are making from their TV deals, if one considers how often the cheerleaders are put up on camera, it is obvious that they should certainly be paid more conventionally for their time.

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No ladies at home

This is partly due the shift from print to ebook and Internet, of course. But I can't help but thinking if part of the decline of a 131-year old magazine isn't in part to the fact that fewer women these days are either ladies or interested in home-making:

The monthly Ladies' Home Journal. After 131 years, the July issue will be its last, reports Ad Age. The website will continue on, and the magazine itself will become a quarterly special-interest publication available starting this fall on newsstands, vs. via subscription. Nonetheless, the entire editorial staff was laid off as part of the change. LHJ has a circulation of 3.2 million, down from a 1968 peak of 6.8 million, according to parent company Meredith.

Of course, such things are often harbingers of a pendulum about to change direction. Given that more mothers are staying home than previously, LHJ may have done the equivalent of buying at the top.

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Ending rape culture

Apparently Sharia has the solution for ending rape culture. Just hang the women. That will kill three birds with one stone, as it should also take care of the growing problem of false-rape accusations as well as teenage pregnancy.

Women who have sex before marriage should be hanged, says senior politician in India's Socialist Party. Abu Azmi, the Socialist Party’s Maharashtra unit chief, says that women who have sex before marriage should be hanged, while the Party's leader says he will scrap a law giving the death penalty to rapists if he’s elected prime minister

If rape happens with or without consent, it should be punished as prescribed in Islam”, Mr Azmi told the Mid-Day website. “The solution is this: any woman, whether married or unmarried, who goes along with a man, with or without her consent, should be hanged. Both should be hanged. It shouldn’t be allowed even if a woman goes by consent.”

Perhaps you may wish to rethink that whole post-Christianity concept, ladies. And if you thought conservatives were oppressive, well, did you really think the socialists would be any better? Hey, you don't suppose any of those Indian immigrants might share Mr. Azmi's beliefs, do you?

No, surely the magic of geographical translocation will take care of that....

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The cost of female coders II

Why wouldn't everyone want to hire them, when doing so just might cost you a top executive or two?

Last month, a number of allegations were made against GitHub and some of its employees, including one of its co-founders, Tom Preston-Werner. We took these claims seriously and launched a full, independent, third-party investigation.

The investigation found no evidence to support the claims against Tom and his wife of sexual or gender-based harassment or retaliation, or of a sexist or hostile work environment. However, while there may have been no legal wrongdoing, the investigator did find evidence of mistakes and errors of judgment. In light of these findings, Tom has submitted his resignation, which the company has accepted. Tom has been a huge part of this company from the very beginning and we appreciate all that he has done for GitHub. We wish him the best in his next endeavour.

As to the remaining allegations, the investigation found no evidence of gender-based discrimination, harassment, retaliation, or abuse.

So, the claims were determined to be false, but the executive resigned. And the woman they hired isn't there anymore either. How does this episode represent a triumph for women in technology, exactly?

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A space of their own

I find the contrast between the female writer's reactions to the exact same concept being expressed by a man and a woman to be fascinating:

“You can have equality in all sorts of professional areas but I don’t see any reason why there shouldn’t be all-male clubs or all-female clubs if you want them. They’re just places you go to to enjoy yourself.”

Perhaps there is something in that. Kylie O’Brien, The Telegraph’s Weekend Editor, who is a member of women’s-only The University Women's Club, tells me: “I have to say, not having men around is really relaxing. It’s nice to be with your own kind. It’s rather warm and welcoming. I think that’s how men feel together. There’s a kind of sympathy together. I think it’s a good thing.”

She thinks it makes sense for men and women to have their own space, and cannot “see what prize there is for women to be gained” in becoming members at gentlemen’s clubs. In that respect, she agrees with Mr X and co, but when I tell her what they think about women’s “shrill voices” and the “slippery slope”, she replies tartly: “Well, if that’s how men really feel, they’re better off on their own.” Hear hear.

What men need to do is simply echo the female justifications for their own single-sex spaces. "It's really relaxing. It's rather warm and welcoming. It's nice to be with your own kind."

And if that isn't enough to get them to stop violating the male sanctums, then black-knight the hell out of them and invade women's shelters, women's gyms, and everything from girls' volleyball teams to scholarship programs.

It's really not that hard to understand why men sometimes don't want women around. Men can't relax around women and women usually attempt to make unwanted changes in any organization they join. Women should respect that, just as men should respect the female desire to keep men out of their bathrooms, locker rooms, and social clubs.

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Truth and the Resurrection

There are those who say that the Resurrection of Jesus Christ of Nazareth is merely a story. They will claim, falsely, that the Risen Lord is derived from an agricultural myth. They will assert, wrongly, that "Easter is originally the celebration of Ishtar, the Assyrian and Babylonian goddess of fertility and sex." They will declare, contra the historical evidence, that Jesus Christ never lived or was crucified on a cross by the Roman authorities.

It is strange, is it not, that they should tell so many palpable lies in the service of that which they say to be truth?

The Apostle Paul once said that if the story of the Crucifixion and Resurrection of Jesus Christ is not true, then we Christians are the saddest and most pathetic of all men. Everything we do, everything we believe, everything for which we hope and strive, is a lie.

It is strange, is it not, that so many observable and long-lived truths should stand so firmly on such a flimsy foundation of falsehood?

From Plato to Zelazny, men of letters have written of the purer things, that in their perfection spawn lesser shadows and imitations that reflect but an aspect of the true essence. From where does truth come, if not the Truth? And did Jesus not say that he was the Way, the Truth, and the Life?

Those who are Aristotelian devotees of reality stand by the Lesser Truth that A is A, and that A is never Not-A. But the Lesser Truth, and all other truths, descends from, and depends upon, the Greater Truth, which is this:

In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. He was with God in the beginning. Through him all things were made; without him nothing was made that has been made. In him was life, and that life was the light of all mankind. The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it.

Yesterday the light shone in the darkness. Today the light shines in the darkness. Tomorrow the light will shine in the darkness. And the darkness will never, ever, overcome it.

It is not a story, it is The Story, it is the oldest story, it is the true story from which all other stories flow. Light versus dark. And despite the darkness that surrounds us, that pervades us, that haunts us, the light of all mankind is winning.

That is why, all around the world this morning, there are millions of men and women who will greet each other with three simple words of hope and truth and triumph.

Christ is risen!

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Never satisfied

A woman manages to turn her coach potato husband onto Cross-Fit, and is now unhappy that he is in excellent condition:

After a few months out of work, Grant became depressed and stopped even trying to look for jobs. I'd come home from work to find him playing Xbox or blankly surfing the Internet at the kitchen table, surrounded by dirty dishes. He was gaining weight, too. Even though we love fried foods, we've always made an effort to eat as little processed food as possible at home--but that changed when he was unemployed. Suddenly, he was going through entire packages of cookies and boxes of cereal.

Seeing him that way was hard. He refused to see a therapist, saying he could work through things on his own. He's never been great at discussing his emotions (even with me) especially when he's feeling down and becomes hypersensitive to criticism. For instance, when I pointed out the weight gain-he needed to buy new pants for a wedding we were attending--we ended up getting into a huge fight. He didn't understand that the weight didn't bother me as much as the changes in his personality--it was just a symptom. He seemed sluggish and despondent, not like the active, up-for-anything guy I married. I didn't love the spare tire around his midsection, but I'd still have been attracted to him if it weren't for the other stuff. And treading lightly by urging him to meet up with the guys for a pickup game or head out on a run just made him hostile, since he could clearly understand the subtext....

 Now, it's as if I'm living with an incredibly fit stranger. We barely have sex--he goes to bed at 10 so he can run or lift at 5--and his preoccupation with his body makes me uncomfortable. I feel like his diet is the most important thing in his life, and because it's "healthy," it's hard to make it sound like a problem. Every time I mention that I wish he could drop the Paleo thing for a night so we could try the raved-about mac and cheese at a new bistro, or that he could take a weeklong break from working out so we could go to the beach with my family, he flips the conversation to make it sound like I'm trying to undermine him and his happiness.

Sometimes I wonder if I might be. After all, he's always inviting me to come with him to "the Box," which I never do. I say I need to look after our daughter or that I'm busy grading papers, but truthfully, working out is not the same priority for me as it is for Grant. Seeing my husband so passionate about something that has nothing to do with me makes me feel left out. I do wonder whether I'd be so annoyed and angry if he had gotten into a more solo activity, like running or biking, and I don't think I would be. I hate that Grant has an entire social life that doesn't include me, and that he's part of a whole fitness movement that's leaving me behind.

It's an ugly feeling. I don't want to be resentful about something that makes my husband feel good--and I know we need to sort through this together. I've done some research on eating and exercise disorders in men and occasionally wonder if Grant may be too obsessive, but I think the issue is more about how his body image and workout routine is affecting us. It'd be different if he were a single guy living by himself. And then, there are the facts: He's a lot healthier, physically and mentally. His numbers at his last doctor's appointment were perfect. When he's around, he loves being a dad. Sometimes he'll take our daughter for a long bike ride on a Saturday afternoon, and I love that she and he are bonding over healthy activities. I only wish he'd put that drive back into our relationship.

Translation: his SMV has improved while hers has declined, so she wants him to reduce it in order to not feel threatened, rather than work on improving her own. This is why focusing on making women happy is a futile goal; their objectives are dynamic which means that it is an ever-receding horizon.

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Better off out

This is not good news for civilization:

Men who entered into fatherhood at around age 25 saw a 68% increase of depressive symptoms over their first five years of being dads—if they lived at the same home as their children.

The study, which was published in the journal Pediatrics, looked at 10,623 young men who were participating in the National Longitudinal Study of Adolescent Health. The study tracked the fathers for about 20 years, and kept score of their depression symptoms.

While fathers who didn’t share a home with their children didn’t experience the same high increase in depressive symptoms in early fatherhood, most of the fathers in the study did live with their children. Those men had lower depression symptoms before they became dads and experienced a spike in symptoms when their child was born and through the first few years.

Translation: fathers who live at home with their children and provide for them have less sex and more responsibility than fathers who abandon them and their mothers for sex with other women.

One of the biggest and most common mistakes a married woman can make is to put her children ahead of her husband. This is not only bad for the husband, it is also bad for the children due to the harm it does to the marital relationship.

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Harder divorce = more marriage

Megan McCardle doesn't think through the consequences of limiting divorce:

I can see the appeal of making marriage more difficult to get out of. My brief tour through the divorce literature indicated that ending a high-conflict marriage is better for everyone, including the kids -- despite the financial and emotional drawbacks, it really is better to have two homes, rather than one where Mom and Dad are engaged in a bitter civil war.

On the other hand, the evidence on ending low-conflict marriages -- one in which maybe one party, or both, doesn’t feel perfectly fulfilled, but they get along OK -- wasn’t so happy. Children of low-conflict marriages whose parents divorce have more difficulty adjusting than the kids of high-conflict marriages. It’s thought that the divorce comes as a shock to these kids; a relationship that seemed fine to them suddenly dissolves, which changes their ability to trust the world and other people.

These divorces aren’t necessarily so great for the adults, either. Divorce tends to be a financial disaster for all but the very rich, because it’s more expensive to support two households than one. And people who exit marriages don’t necessarily find this makes them happier. We tend to think that marriages are good, and then they go bad, and then you divorce and get happy again, but unhappiness can often be a temporary condition that later improves....

The lesson is that when you make it harder to exit, you also make people reluctant to enter. If we try to strengthen marriage by clamping down on divorce, we may find that more and more people simply refuse to get married in the first place.

It's written from the perspective of a woman who wants to retain her out. Her position makes no sense. If she were correct, marriage rates would have climbed with no-fault divorce. Instead, they have collapsed. Men aren't avoiding marriage because they are afraid of being held to their marital contract, but because they are afraid of women not being held to it.

What ultimately threatens marriage is the state's involvement in it. The best way to strengthen it is to sever all connection between the religious sacrament and the state. Let the state permit civil partnerships of one or two or ten individuals; they can use the corporate model and be subject to dissolution as per contract.

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Don't listen to the freaks

The preachers of tolerance don't actually believe in equality. They are malformed people who erroneously believe that if they can get you to accept their depravity, it will somehow heal their shattered psychologies.

A prominent advocate for transgender and women's rights in the tech world has been charged with raping her wife, The San Francisco Examiner has learned. Dana McCallum, a senior engineer at Twitter who speaks and writes about women's and transgender-rights and technology issues, was arrested Jan. 26 and booked into County Jail on suspicion of five felonies, according to the Sheriff's Department.

McCallum, 31, who was born a male, openly identifies as a female and whose legal name is Dana Contreras, was charged Jan. 29 with five felonies, including three counts of spousal rape, one count of false imprisonment and one count of domestic violence, according to the District Attorney's Office. She has since pleaded not guilty.

As any policeman can tell you, the sexual freaks are significantly overrepresented among the criminal population. They do not behave badly because they are psychologically damaged by society's rejection, they behave badly and are socially rejected because they are intrinsically psychologically abnormal.

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Alpha Mail: are gays misogynist?

 The question is asked:

Ever heard of Redstockings? They've argued precisely this, because if you're gay you're denying sexual attention to women and thus being a misogynist.

Really.

Honestly, (radical second wave and third wave) feminism has thrown gay men under the bus. Why? Feminists (of these types) argue that there is no such thing as homophobia against gay men. They argue that gay men are discriminated against because they're socially perceived as feminine... ergo, gay bashings are just the Patriarchy backfiring onto men!

Feminists really need to make up their minds... are gay men seen as women by society? Or do gay men get treated like men are and thus possess "male privilege"? Both of these statements cannot be true at the same time, yet feminists (of these kinds) simultaneously hold to both: gay men are victims of the patriarchy because they're socially perceived as and treated as women, yet apparently because of their penises they possess "male privilege."

But we don't give chivalry to gay men, and "never hit a woman" hardly saved Matthew Shepard's life. And several stereotypes of gay men may be effeminate, but several other stereotypes of gay men are in fact hypermasculine ("all gay men are sex-obsessed sexual predators" for example).

Of course feminists want to enlist gay men to fight for their cause (and take them shopping) but the simple fact is that gay men, like all kinds of gender-non-normative males (including nerdy men and camp-straight men etc.) are socially treated as a third gender.

But feminism doesn't want to accept this. If it did, its entire model of unidirectional class-based gender oppression instantly becomes untenable.

So feminism throws gay men under the bus.

All we really need to know is the First Law of the Female Imperative: do they help or hinder the free flow of resources from men to women. To which, the answer is obviously: hinder. Therefore, homosexual men are intrinsically misogynist regardless of how they regard or behave towards women.

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Why N lowers MMV

This should suffice to explain to even the most thick-headed woman why men view even moderate-N women as being less marriageable:

Murdered bride Anni Dewani 'told her cousin that husband Shrien was a flop in bed' Uncle claims Anni Dewani 'sent text about honeymoon sex to cousin. It allegedly said: 'Finally did it. Not as good as my previous boyfriends'

Now, obviously there was a lot more going wrong in the Dewani household than Mr. Dewani's inability to live up to the alpha ghosts of the late Mrs. Dewani's past. But the fact that men know women are going to make those comparisons, and quite possibly sabotage their entire marital sex lives over them, presents a sufficient risk to justify nexting a woman who would otherwise be a good marital prospect.

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The cost of Grrrl Power

The GNOME foundation discovers that a devotion to the advancement of feminist propaganda can get in the way of any actual work being done:

The Foundation does not have any cash reserves right now.

Why has this happened?

The Outreach Program for Women (OPW) has proven to be extremely popular and has grown quite rapidly both in terms of the number of interns and the number of participating organizations. GNOME, as the lead organization, has been responsible for managing the finances for the entire effort. However, as the program grew, the processes did not keep up. The changes were not tracked effectively from the point when other organizations joined the OPW. This impacted not only our ability to manage the OPW administration, but also to keep up with the core financial tasks of the Foundation -- tasks which already needed the full attention of the Foundation's employees and the board.

As a result of these issues, we have only just now finalized our 2014 budget. In the meantime, we made assumptions based on previous years' incomes and expenditures, and we authorized expenditures for this year based on those assumptions. Those assumptions proved to be more optimistic than reality. In addition, while our outgoing payments to interns must be strictly timed, the incoming payments from sponsoring organizations are very fluid, thus we have had to front the costs of OPW. Fronting these costs has resulted in a budget shortfall.

Well, I think we can all agree that reaching out to girls who don't have any real interest in programming is more important than whatever it is the GNOME foundation was formed to do. Why not simply continue the vital work of the Outreach Program for Woman with their sole compensation being the ability to bask in the approval of all right-thinking individuals?

It would be unfortunate if the Open Source movement was strangled by its misguided insistence on getting more women involved. In fact, one almost wonders if Microsoft might not behind it somehow....

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Society goes to the dogs

Literally, it appears:

If you’re wondering why playgrounds around the city are so quiet and dog runs are packed, a new report has an answer: More and more US women are forgoing motherhood and getting their maternal kicks by owning handbag-size canines. Data from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention show that a big drop in the number of babies born to women ages 15 to 29 corresponds with a huge increase in the number of tiny pooches owned by young US women, reports the business-news site Quartz.

Dog-crazy New York ladies told The Post that they aren’t surprised by the findings — and that they happily gave up diaper changes, temper tantrums and college funds for the easy affection of their doggy “child.”

“I’d rather have a dog over a kid,” declared Sara Foster, 30, a Chelsea equities trader who says her French bulldog, Maddie, brings her more joy than a child. “It’s just less work and, honestly, I have more time to go out. You . . . don’t have to get a baby sitter.”

The federal data behind the report show that over the past seven years, the number of live births per 1,000 women between ages 15 and 29 in America has plunged 9 percent. At the same time, research by the American Pet Products Association shows the number of small dogs — under 25 pounds — in the United States has skyrocketed, from 34. 1 million in 2008 to 40.8 million in 2012.

Unfortunately, it is unlikely these small dogs will be able to take much care of these women in their old age. I suppose that's what cats are for.  Perhaps that's what will demarcate female middle-age in the future: the exchange of a woman's toy dog for her first cat.

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The power of the Female Imperative

And the boundless horror of the female fear of public humiliation. It's amazing what women can manage to achieve together when they go into a prohibition-frenzy:

A controversial Facebook group which invites commuters to post photos of women eating on the Tube has been shut down.The group entitled Women Who Eat On Tubes was created in 2011, but recently hit the headlines after Transport for London said that those that feel threatened should contact the British Transport Police. The group, which has more than 21,000 members, asks users to provide information including what the person was eating, what time the photo was taken and on what line.

The idea that Facebook, of all companies, should shut down a group due to the posting of legal photos deemed intrusive, is indeed ironic. Although it does point to a potentially effective strategy for Westerners who hope to challenge the surveillance society.

"Privacy campaign Big Brother Watch called for the law to be changed to deter people from taking photos of strangers in cases where they intend to publish them."

The only question is if more women are afraid of being embarrassed by being seen stuffing their faces than they are of crime.

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Learning, but not fast enough

Some Generation X mothers appear to have learned from the mistakes of their mothers:

After decades of decline, the share of mothers who stay home with their children has steadily risen over the last several years, a new report has found. In 2012, 29% of all mothers with children under age 18 stayed at home, a figure that has steadily risen since 1999 when 23% of mothers were stay-at-home, the Pew Research Center reported Tuesday. The share of stay-at-home moms had been dropping since 1967, when about half of all moms stayed home.

I don't think it is an accident that the first generation of mothers to grow up without mothers in the home have concluded that the grand social experiment was a disaster. Now if they will only abandon the rest of the equalitarian program, there may be some hope for the future of the West.

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The female war on consequences

It's really remarkable how many female-driven social policies are little more than a demand for a consensual denial of reality:

The young woman decided one day that she would be honest with her boyfriend, whom she had not slept with, and told him she was not a virgin.

"But as soon as he knew, he refused to marry and did everything he could to get me into his bed. That's the way Tunisian men think. A woman who has had sex before marriage is just a slut and can't be a good mother!"

Another young woman, Sabra, believes unmarried women should have the right to a sex life just like the men, and that virginity is never a guarantee of fidelity. But the 27-year-old also chose to lie and yield to social pressures, rather than run the risk of remaining single.

"If I had told my husband that I wasn't a virgin, he would never have agreed to marry me. And it's the same for many women in Tunisia."

The thing is, there is nothing at all stopping these women from having a sex life. They have the right to it and they have merely to exercise that right if they so choose. But men also have a right to demand a virgin wife, and to refuse to marry any woman who has disqualifed herself by having sex with other men.

These women are simply evil. They are building their relationships on fraud. It is true that virginity is not a guarantee of fidelity, but marrying on the basis of a lie is, in itself, an act of infidelity.

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16 years later

They finally notice. Feelings versus reality:

Women feel invisible to the opposite sex at the age of 51, it emerged yesterday. A detailed study of 2,000 women revealed a large percentage felt they no longer received the level of attention they once did after hitting 51.

Many even went as far as to admit they felt ‘ignored’.

The women claimed their confidence plummeted after hitting 50 and blamed greying hair, having to to wear glasses or even struggling to find fashionable clothes.

This is mildly amusing for two reasons. First, welcome to equality. No one notices 99 percent of the men of any age, unless they are less than three years old. Second, the idea that men pay attention to women who are 49, or 45, or even 40, is absurd. 35 is probably the maximum age at which men pay any noticeable attention to strange women in public.

There are the occasional outliers, of course, just as the most exceptional men will command female attention in public. But, for the most part, men don't pay attention to unknown women over 35. This doesn't mean that women cease to be attractive at that age, only that they're no longer on the radar of the average male stranger.

I don't understand why this should be either surprising or upsetting to women. Men don't expect to remain competitive athletes for long outside their twenties; I'm years away from 51 and I'm already the second-oldest player on my veteran's soccer team.

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Alpha Mail: how to respond?

Rek asks: What would have been some good answers/attitudes to adopt [in the case of the hapless Gamma from the Ford Fiesta ad]? Silence is my default response. 

Silence is, in most circumstances, sub-optimal, but it is usually better than inept self-defense. Women tend to take silence as acquiescence if they are not trying to talk to you; if they are trying to talk to you they take it as a childish refusal to communicate.

However, the answer is predicated upon whether the man involved is actually responsible or not. One cannot respond to a legitimate criticism in the same manner one responds to an illegitimate one. If the complaint about the man being late all the time is more or less true, and he is the present cause of them being late, then he owes her an apology. He should simply say: "You're right. It was my fault we're late. I'm sorry. I hope your parents won't be too upset and I will apologize to them when we get there."

(In the commercial, the guy does indicate that it was indeed his fault. The woman is clearly steaming mad and the guy is already sheepish before either of them says anything. However, being a Gamma, he can't simply take responsibility, and in fact, their being late might well be the result of his passive-aggressive refusal to get ready on time because he doesn't want to go.)

Remember, he has put her in a bad position in a potentially stressful situation. She's going to get blamed by her mother - her father may not notice but her mother surely will - and he owes it to her to ensure that she isn't criticized for his tardiness.

On the other hand, if their being late was not his fault, then she is simply using him as a punching bag in preparation for the well-merited criticism she knows she is going to receive. In that case, a very sharp response that goes to the heart of the matter is in order: "Don't try to put this off on me. You're the one who decided we had to go to their house and you know perfectly well that I was ready to go on time. If your mother is on the warpath again, that's your problem. You can deal with her while I have a drink with your Dad outside on the porch. One can hardly blame the poor guy."

One key distinction between high status and low status is the attitude towards responsibility. The high status man is comfortable taking responsibility. He is accustomed to it. The low status man is uncomfortable with any responsibility and runs from it in most circumstances, particularly when it involves conflict.

Alpha: Yeah, I did it. So what?
Beta: Yeah, I did it.
Delta: Yeah, I did it. Is that a problem?
Gamma: I didn't do it! It's not my fault!
Omega: (frightened deer-in-the-headlights stare)
Sigma: I think you really have to look at society's role in all of this.

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The international Gamma

We've been seeing this ad in both the UK and Italy. I didn't find an English version, however, so here is the Italian. The dialogue:

Woman: We're always late and it's always your fault!
Gamma: Your father won't even notice. (whistles)
Woman: (icy glare)
Gamma: (realizes he's gone too far, supplicates) No, darling-
Woman: Forget it!
Gamma: (sends text) Forgive him, he's an idiot.
Both: (she is amused by his self-deprecation and relents, he leans in and laughs in a wheedling and self-deprecatory manner.)

Notice the following Game-related points:

1. She's a dominant bitch, she's driving.
2. He attempts to deflect rather than risk conflict by directly addressing her accusation, but only makes matters worse.
3. She indicates her displeasure by withholding communication.
4. His initial attempt at supplication is unsuccessful.
5. He can't bear her displeasure and escalates his supplication.
6. She finally consents to permit him to return to the familiar comfort of his inferior position.

If your reaction to relationship conflict is similar to this, you are exhibiting Gamma behavior patterns and it is unlikely that you have a secure relationship with the woman in your life.

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Delta face

No one who saw this picture and understands Game was even remotely surprised by the way the Mozilla debacle played out over the last week. Human socio-sexuality is visible to the naked eye; just look at the soft features, the large, teddy-bearish frame, and most important, the uncertain, ready-to-please smile.

This is the very image of a white knight, of a pedestalizer, of a man who would rather surrender than fight. It is the very image of the Delta Male

This is not to say that Brandon Eich is a bad man, an idiot, a failure, or a man to be despised. Quite to the contrary, he is a good man, a highly intelligent man, a massive success, and a man to be admired for his many good qualities. Which, therefore, make him an object lesson in how socio-sexuality is orthogonal to many of those qualities.

Eich responded to his critics in a classic Delta manner. He attempted to assuage and to reason with them. And that is why he failed. He did not snipe back passive-aggressively and appeal to the crowd like a Gamma, he did not enlist superior allies like a Beta, and he did not wreak vengeance upon his challengers like an Alpha. Given his position as Mozilla CEO, the Alpha response was the correct one, indeed, it was the only one that would have ensured his status.

But, here we see how a man's contextual socio-sexual status always gives way to the man's true rank. Given sufficient time, Eich's rank might have eventually grown to reach his contextual status, but he met with the challenge much too soon into his new position, responded inappropriately, and unsurprisingly, met with complete failure.

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Losing sans competition

The reason women who can do STEM don't do STEM:

Apparently, a key reason that young women aren't choosing careers in STEM is dating. Maria Klawe, President of Harvey Mudd College, found concern that their 'geeky' male classmates will present poor social prospects is genuinely one of three key barriers to young women entering STEM (along with concerns that it would be boring, and that they wouldn't be any good at it). This information depressed me for the rest of the day.

Klawe reported her intriguing finding at the Future Tense Women in STEM event in Washington DC last week. She is a role model for college leaders who seek to attract young women to study STEM subjects -- by which I mean science, technology, engineering and mathematics, subjects where men still outnumber women by three to one. Harvey Mudd College has impressively redesigned their teaching methods to even out the gender ratio in their STEM programs. But the main message of the day was that attracting women into STEM is just the first step

Nobel prize winner Carol Greider explained that the issue is not just a deficit of women entering the STEM pipeline; rather, the key challenge is that the pipe is leaky.

Note that Ms Klawe is the woman who has successfully dumbed down the Computer Science program at Harvey Mudd. Perhaps if they paid some dumb, but good-looking jocks to sit in the STEM classes, more smart girls would be inclined to take them.

This further confirms the truth of Game. Even in a predominantly male environment, the women can't find anyone to date because there are so few Alphas in STEM. These young women would literally rather date no one than the STEM students and prefer reduced employment prospects to accepting the reduction in their socio-sexual status involved in having sex with gamma nerds.

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The maturation delta

This is why women can't count on their age peers being willing to marry them when they are done having fun and ready to settle down:

I am 23 years old, male, and have had sex with only three women. Most people would agree this is very few, especially considering I have only been in two relationships. I have not had sex for more than a year. I recently got to know someone close to my age, and we got on well. I found out, however, that she had slept with more than 50 men and was unable to put this out of my head. I find myself feeling disgusted and jealous towards women who have slept with many more people than me. But, at my age, it seems all attractive women are well into double figures. I feel trapped and that the older I get, the more extreme the issue will become.

It's fine for women to declare that young men should simply man up and marry the sluts, but the reality is that the men simply aren't enthusiastic about this. The matter is usually settled by the woman dropping her standards a little and paying for her extensive experience by accepting a lower status man than she had hitherto enjoyed. Cue "alpha widow" syndrome, mutual disappointment, and so forth.

Unfortunately, there isn't any optimal solution. But it's on the men too; if you want a less experienced woman and you're not already presented with a smorgasborg of options, then you probably have to go younger or uglier than you are currently considering, and the latter is much easier than the former.

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A feminist rationale for young motherhood

It's interesting to see how this woman's solipsism actually leads her to the correct conclusion for all the wrong reasons:

I couldn’t think of a dignified way to explain to the doctors that my boyfriend of three years had pulled out of the sessions we were about to start.

We had been for all the tests and I had psyched myself up to start injecting myself with a cocktail of hormones. I was just about to go to the pharmacy to pick up the drugs that would kick off our quest for a baby when my boyfriend, a successful broker, phoned me.

His voice was emotionless as he told me he didn’t want to go through with it. “It’s all too much,” he told me. “Maybe next year…”

Maybe next year? The sad truth was I didn’t have many years left. I was 37 and increasingly desperate to start a family. But despite my ticking clock, I had heard those three words many times before, from him and a previous partner to whom I had been engaged several years earlier.

Indeed, the truth is that I have experienced nothing but trouble whenever I have attempted to persuade a man to have children with me.

To suggest, as some experts do, that somehow the age at which women conceive is within their control, is naive and misleading.

There are still some stubborn taboos about conception, and one of them involves the myth that deciding to have children is something women and men do together in an open and honest manner.

For some lucky couples it may be like that. But that is not my experience, nor the experience of many of my girlfriends.

I’m sorry if I offend any male readers by suggesting that they do not always play fair in matters of fertility. But in my experience men increasingly behave with terrible selfishness when it comes to giving up their bachelor lifestyles.

Yes, perhaps women should try to have babies early — but not because that is the best time to have children, but because it might be the only time to have them. For if, like me, you have spent your thirties being involved with a series of men who enjoy their freedom, you will know it is simply a statement of fact that today’s young males really aren’t keen to become fathers.

She is still blaming men for her own failure to start trying to have children sooner, of course, but at least she is telling young women to learn from the consequences of her mistakes. It probably hasn't occurred to most women who are putting off child-bearing until the deadline to realize that if men do the exact same thing, they will be waiting until they are in their fifties or sixties to have children.

Why should men not spend their 30s and 40s having fun, after all. They have plenty of time in which they can still have children, right?

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