Alpha Mail: too slow, sport

A reader hasn't learned the Window of Opportunity concept yet:

I got burned by a chick today. Met her a week ago at a well known clothing store.  I had to buy an article of clothing as the one I had was starting to fall apart.  She suggested some articles, we found one that worked.  Then she asked, "Is there anything else your little heart desires?"  She asked the same thing two days later after helping me.  She asked what I was doing afterwards and I told her nothing (I was a bit slow on the uptake).  I asked her and she said she was going to watch some shows on Netflix. 

Fast forward to two days later I go back for another sale they're having and to ask her out.  She formally introduces herself.  I never tell her my name (though she could look it up due to me being a preferred customer).  We joke for a bit and I ask her what her plans are.  She's hanging out with friends afterwards (not going to get into specifics but it was a closed get together).  Should've asked her for a future date out but didn't. 

The following day I go into get some shoes.  Someone else helped me out BUT she made a point to come over and talk to me.  We weren't alone long enough for me to ask her out.

I get a call today, the shoes are in.  I go over there and although someone else greets me at the store, she, basically, jumps in and  asks what I need.  We shoot the breeze again and I ask her out for a beer.  It turns out she has a boyfriend and she doesn't think he'd look too highly on that.  I made a comment to the effect of, "Well, that's a shame."  As I'm leaving, she smiles and says, "Goodbye!" followed by my name. 

Now, I've asked several friends, including two of whom are women, their take on the situation.  One called this chick out for flirting with me even though she has a boyfriend.  The other, disappointingly (as I believed she would've called her out too) said I could've found out she was taken a week ago and then hastily added, "but I'm sorry."

Per the hierarchy, I think I'm a low beta or high delta.  I can tell you that sixteen months ago I wouldn't have ever thought of asking someone out like her or even have known how to joke around.  I credit you, Tomassi, Dalrock, and DG for that.  So thanks one and all.  Also, I'm in my late 20's.  Are there any real generational gaps I should be aware of vis-a-vis women?  What are your and the readers' thoughts on her?  Additionally, did I move too slowly?

First, let's get things straight. You're a delta. Your behavior was about as conventionally delta as it is possible to be. A woman sent you clear signals of interest, with a mild spice of challenging contempt, and you failed the test about as flawlessly as possible. The clear sign of the delta: waiting for permission and encouragement to approach.

Second, she is a flirt and she's seeking dominant men. Her repetitive use of the phrase "little heart" is intentionally belittling. Any time a woman uses a term like that and the first phrase out of your mouth doesn't involve "massive tool" or "giant penis", you've lost. The correct Alpha response would be something on the order of "my little heart is good but my giant penis thinks we should go for drinks when you get off". Never let a woman saddle you with a deprecating term without reframing. It's very simple: whatever term they use, apply the opposite.

Of course, men of sufficiently high socio-sexual status can play the opposite game. I was once in the gym doing shoulder press with two 80-pound dumbbells, thereby inspiring a gym bunny to call out: "Geez, what are you compensating for?" I didn't interrupt the set, but immediately called back "very small penis!" which cracked her and everyone else up.

Third, you're missing the point. She may or may not have a boyfriend, (although if she is pretty she has a few orbiters on the string at the very least), but she was potentially looking to trade up. Hypergamy dictates that girls with boyfriends are often going to flirt with men they think might be a better deal. If you can't deal with that, then go find a woman who is 1 or 2 points below you in attractiveness and content yourself with her being loyal, faithful, and true. Any girlfriend who perceives herself as being at or above your level is going to occasionally flirt with the idea of trading you in. That's not because she's an unfaithful slut unworthy of your protection and manly chivalry, it's because she is a woman and that is what women do.

Fourth, in case it isn't clear by now, yes, you moved far too slowly. Stop looking for "the right moment". The right moment is always NOW. Women have windows of opportunity, and the more attractive she is, the faster that window closes. She might have gone out with you the first time or two. Once you showed that you're just a lowly delta in need of encouragement in order to find the courage to approach, she lost whatever interest she had.

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